Lillooet Secondary School

SHREKOnce upon a time there was a lovelyprincess. But she had an enchantmentupon her of a fearful sort which couldonly be broken by love's first kiss.She was locked away in a castle guardedby a terrible fire-breathing dragon.Many brave knights had attempted tofree her from this dreadful prison,but non prevailed. She waited in thedragon's keep in the highest room ofthe tallest tower for her true loveand true love's first kiss. (laughs)Like that's ever gonna happen. Whata load of - (toilet flush)Allstar - by Smashmouth begins to play. Shrek goes about hisday. While in a nearby town, the villagers get together to goafter the ogre.NIGHT - NEAR SHREK'S HOMEMAN1Think it's in there?MAN2All right. Let's get it!MAN1Whoa. Hold on. Do you know what thatthing can do to you?MAN3Yeah, it'll grind your bones for it'sbread.Shrek sneaks up behind them and laughs.SHREKYes, well, actually, that would be agiant. Now, ogres, oh they're much worse.They'll make a suit from your freshlypeeled skin.MENNo!SHREKThey'll shave your liver. Squeeze thejelly from your eyes! Actually, it'squite good on toast.MAN1Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn ya!(waves the torch at Shrek.)Shrek calmly licks his fingers and extinguishes the torch. Themen shrink back away from him. Shrek roars very loudly and longand his breath extinguishes all the remaining torches until themen are in the dark.SHREKThis is the part where you run away.(The men scramble to get away. He laughs.)And stay out! (looks down and picksup a piece of paper. Reads.) Wanted.Fairy tale creatures."(He sighs andthrows the paper over his shoulder.)THE NEXT DAYThere is a line of fairy tale creatures. The head of the guardsits at a table paying people for bringing the fairy tale creaturesto him. There are cages all around. Some of the people in lineare Peter Pan